Reports across the country are coming in saying SCOTT BAIO IS MARRIED. The Baio Watch news team would like to tell you that this is a lie. Scott Baio can not be married. Not because he doesn’t want to be married, but because he can’t. Scott Baio is actually the child of a god, Zeus to be exact. With his godly powers he is prevented from marrying any human…

This elaberate hoax was all set up by Buddy from Charles in Charge, who is less commonly known as Willie Aames or Satan. Buddy featured on the right, has always been jealous of Baio. His anger stems from a Scott Baio Birthday orgy party, where Baio slept with his mother, sister, cousin, aunt, grandmother, sister in law, second cousin and his high school baby sister Jane Macormick. Ever since that day buddy has been planning his revenge.

Sadly “news” channels have fallen for this cleaver trick. So I would again say SCOTT BAIO IS NOT MARRIED, he is currently on a cross country tour de-flowering virgins.

Have a good day and remember BAIO is watching you when you masturbate.

Jess 

Looks like a corporate blog. Is this your attempt at guerilla marketing, folks? We’re not impressed.

 We got this comment today.  I am not sure if I should be offended because Jess is not impressed… or flattered that our websites looks like some corporate attempt at marketing.  First off if it was a corporate blog it would not have google ad’s on it.  This is a website made by Broch Johnson and Francis Murphy two men dedicated Baio and nothing more.

If this was a corporate website, I want to work there because we post every week or so and grow great mustaches.  Now that is what I call a Job.

Jess I think the conspiracy theory game isn’t your cup of tea.  But good try.

New FLASH:  Scott Baio was spotted in West Hollywood, roller blading, shirtless, and pant less.  Police thought about arresting Baio but were over come by his sexiness.

Scott Baio should have drop kicked these guys, and had us interview him. Then the full frontal wouldn’t be a joke but a reality.

Scott Baio can smell fear. Two more seconds and they would have been dead for giving such a bad interview.

Photos have surfaced of what appears to be an intoxicated Scott Baio running wild in the hills of North Hollywood. It has been rumored that Scott Baio was seen stripped down to his famous 81 white speedo, running rampant through the N. Hollywood hills screaming explicit words and reciting the lyrics to the Black Eyed Peas song, “My Humps”. Local authorities and the BaioWatch News Team have been called to the scene however, neither have yet to spot the pop icon. The only siting was from a photo taken by a Hollywood resident on a hike before the authorities arrived.  

Photo taken by N. Hollywood resident Blake Nelson.

Keep returning for more news.

Baio Watch News

Scott Baio’s new show is a hit.  Like we didn’t see that coming… With Scott Baio again in the publics eye we begin to wonder, who is Scott Baio and how did he get so damn cool.  After doing some hard cutting journalism, we have found out that Scott Baio has hired a life coach to help him deal with his greatness.  His life coach calls her self Dr. Ali, and runs a website called http://www.screamandrunnaked.com.  We have attempted to contact Dr. Ali and see if she could shed some light on the man we all know as King Baio.  Unfortunalty she has not returned our calls.  Our 1k unique visitors a day isn’t enough to sway her from the Baio code of silence.  Scott Baio is a powerful sorcerer…  Dr.  Ali  feel free to contact us if you ever change your mind.

Scott Baio is a man of great mystery. People have debated the existence of Scott Baio for many years now. Some have claimed that Scott Baio has had sex with family member or even them selves. Many woman around the world say they have had babies from Scott Baio. All of this of course is sadly unproven. With not official Scott Baio siting ever reported it will be hard to distinguish what is real and what is fake. But we do know 10 things to be true:

1. Scott Baio never sleeps, he gains energy by having sex with woman
2. Scott Baio eats only one thing, edible panties
3. Scott Baio was born in an egg
4. Scott Baio preforms all of his own stunts
5. Scott Baio is huge in Japan, so huge infact every man and woman has claimed to have slept with him
6. Scott Baio gives love advice to Jesus
7. Scott Baio has turned down offers to be America’s President. If Baio were to run there would be no election, simply an orgy
8. Vh1 paid 1 billion dollars to get Scott Baio on there TV show. Scott has sent 300 clones of him self to do the show.
9. Scott Baio’s favorite movie is the Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas story
10. Scott Baio only wears bikini brief

A reader has sumbitted this historical Scott Baio story:

Scott Baio was the man of my dreams. When I was 12 I knew that me and Scott were meant to be together. My parents told me that I was too young to be in love and that Scott Baio wasn’t gay. Yes I am a man and yes I love Scott Baio, HE LOVES ME TOO DAMN IT. Scott remember that time on Charles In Charge and you looked at me through the TV screen? I know we connected then and we can connect again now. You don’t have to be single your whole life because you’ve have me…

Remember me Scott?

Love

Tom Baio

Truly a tear jerking story. Thank you Tom Baio and from all of us here at Baio Watch News. Good Night.